on cny’s eve
jus talked to ben over msn abt my r/s probs. he feels that my demand for constant attention is too much n if i dun stop, the r/s will be over sooner than i thot.
i noe… that’s wat i thot too. im so damn pessimistic now n i can almost see the end of the r/s. and so i suggested a break up. sometimes i do the weirdest things in the world, but then i jus dun have any faith in the r/s. i have problem trusting guys. n then i think, why the hell am i in a r/s now?
it’s funny huh.. how the feelings can change over a few mths. it was all nice n sweet initially n i thot im almost ready to marry my sweetheart and then all of a sudden things are jus not how they used to be. i guess i din see clearly enough, it was all part of my wishful thinking. there isnt any fairytale in this world after all.
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